Jesus talking about the first love

One morning I was watching a Christian TV show broadcasting the services of a local church. In the service, a lady ,who is also the wife of the church pastor, was speaking to the congregation. Not only her talk was encouraging but I was inspired by the way she carried herself. Based on my observation she could well be in her fifties, she dressed decently and appeared as a young woman blossoming as if she was not carrying the great marks of motherhood or married life. In other words, she looked as if life did not affect her choice to look blossoming in appearance.

It really struck in my spirit because the night before,God spoke to me in a dream and He said: 'Love is also about maintaining..'

In Revelation 2:4:

'Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken the love you had at first.' (NIV)

The Centenary English Version Bible of the same passage reads:

'But I do have something against you! And it is this: You don't have as much love as you used to.

The passage of 'Revelation 2:4' proves the following: 'simply because we loved with burning fire at a certain stage in our lives, does not necessarily mean that we will automatically keep the same love throughout the years, unless we decide to maintain it.'

This truth is valid in ministry,in life, in our relationships, in our marriages,in our relationship with God. We often fail in those mentioned areas because we tend to assume that no efforts or energy will be required of us in a long ter in order to maintain our first love.

I can hear a reader say: 'Maurice, I think that you are legalistic now when it comes to love.'

'No,on the contrary, my text is scriptural'.

In The book of Revelation chapter 2, Jesus appears to John and gives him a message for the Church of Ephesus: From verse 2 to verse 3, Jesus gives a positive report or positive compliments to the Church of Ephesus. Then in verse 4, He rebukes the church of Ephesus for forsaking her first love. However, in verse 5, Jesus gives a remedy to gain back the first love lost. And this is the remedy: 'Repent and do the things you did at first'

This is how the passage of Revelation 2:1-5 can actually be applied in order to build and maintain enduring love:

1. Let us mention the positive sides in others:' when want to fix relationships (marriage,family, friendship, ministry service...), we have to mention the positive characteristics of others before blasting them with reproach. All too often, a person may tell another: 'you are no longer like you used to be!' And the 'rebuker' will do so while forgetting to mention the positive characteristics of the other. As a result when we reproach a loved one without even mentioning a single positive thing, they often feel extremely violated and they remain close to the possibility of changing.

This is what goes through the mind of a person who is constantly rebuked without encouragement: ' So you guys think nothing good about me?'

2. The first love is something to maintain: 'Love is seen,felt through actions. A famous RnB singer from the 90's once sung: 'even if I don't say that I love you, remember that I do'. We often think that we will not need to keep doing the things we do now when we show love to others. The young man in a dating relationship may think that he will not to buy flowers and chocolate to his girlfriend once they get married; but he is wrong to think that way. The burning fire of love is a thing that can only survive when we maintain it. This is true for marriage, dating, parental relationships, ministry,friendship. You see in the Book of Revelation 2, Jesus gives a good report to the church but the problem starts when He mentions that the church has left her first love. Equally, in all our relationships, the problems will start when we forsake our first love.

3. The remedy:' I like what Jesus does in the process of fixing relationships. Not only does He compliment and rebuke but He also offers a remedy: 'Repent and do the things you used to do'. It is very important that we read the remedy in the order presented by Jesus:

A. Repent: Notice that Jesus does not just tell the church to jump into doing the things they used to do but He tells the church to repent first. Repentance is a crucial step assisting us in admitting our wrong doing and shortcoming. Repentance holds the power to instill in us a disgust' or 'distaste' for actions or shortcomings destroying our relationships. The distaste creates in us the desire to move away from those negative things and finally 'repentance' will lead to ask for forgiveness. Saying 'I am sorry' can save so many relationships.

'I am sorry for not paying attention to you like I used to do...

'I am sorry for neglecting you...

Once we ask for forgiveness, we show importance to the grieving party and we also show them that their concerns really matter instead of 'barking back' in self defense.

B. Do the things you used to do:

Once we repent, we will return to doing things we used to do with sincerity.

Your wife is still your girlfriend. Keep doing Whatever you used to do for her (buying flowers, buying chocolates,watching movies together,talking as a charmer, being funny, go to the gym, etc...). These were the things that made her fall in fall with you. Keep being the dedicated boyfriend.

Your husband is still your boyfriend. Keep doing whatever you used to do to lead him on.Simply because you both have kids,or are married for a while, it does not mean that you can't perform the things you guys both used to do when you were dating. These are the things that led your then 'boyfriend' to pop the question. You are still his girlfriend. Keep doing them for him, it does not have to end.

Now, I totally condemn adulterous relationships and I stand firm by the belief that there are no valid reasons justifying adultery. But one of the reasons why certain married people go out to have extra marital relations with a boyfriend or a girlfriend, is because the girlfriend/boyfriend they married years ago is no longer existing in their marriage...

Do the things you used to do in your ministry, in your purpose. The first love principle also applies to the things God has called us to do.

Think of it: 'Love is also about maintenance...'

Invest some energy in it.